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Private Investigator – Chapter 10

Posted in erbooker by erbooker on 12/30/2014

Private Investigator

Frank Francis is a private detective. A private eye. A private dick.

Chapter 10 – Last Night When We Were Young

Albert & I were headed to the Koreatown section of Hoboken, where I set up my first P.I. office after getting kicked off the force years ago.

“What does Koreatown have to do with our horse poisoning case, boss?”

“Horse doctor told me some vital organs had been removed from the dead horsies.”

“Wow, a horse doctor.”

“Not what you’re thinking, Albert.”

The thought bubble above Albert’s head with a horse holding a stethoscope pops and vanishes.

“The missing horse organs are used in Korean cuisine, which I used to dine on all the time when I lived here.”

“You eat horse?”

“Occasionally, when I can afford it. Dong, my good man.!”

Mangwan Dong was the proprietor of Dong’s Meats, the butcher shop my old office/apartment used to be located above. I woke up to the smell of Dong’s meat every morning. Talk about mouthwatering, folks.

Albert pushed his way into the back room so we could have a look around.

“So Dong, gotten any new organ shipments lately?”

“No. Just regular, Detective. How P.I. business?”

“Booming, Dong. Booming.”

I flipped over a soggy red cut of meat, “What’s this, a liver?”

“Horse penis. You wash hands?”

I wiped horse penis gunk on my trench-coat, “Well, I will now.”

Albert placed a handkerchief over his mouth, holding in a retch, “I don’t know how you people can eat horse meat. Especially from a poisoned horse.”

Dong frowned, “Poison horse? We would never use poison horse meat.”

“Well, then who would poison those horses?”

“I dunno. You detective. I got problems of my own.”

“What’s troubling you, Dong?”

“We been shaken down by local thugs. We bleedin’ money!”

“Who’s shaking you down. Maybe your old pal Det. Francis can help.”

“The Dorsey Gang.”

Albert gave me a look between dry-heaves, “Olivia.”

Dong nods, “She mean lady. She say Guangpong soup taste like piss!”

Albert’s face contorts, “Guangpong?”

I nodded, “Horse piss soup. Dong, my man, I’m gonna take care of your shakedown problem.”

“Oh, thank you Detective. Can I wrap up a horse penis for you?”

“Just gimme a napkin, I’ll eat it in the car.”

Albert & I exited Dong’s Meats and the ex-heavyweight finally took a full breath, “So lemme get this straight: Now we’re working on Slapsie’s record contract, the Jewish mob’s poisoned racehorses and a Korean butcher getting shaken down by my ex-girlfriend’s street gang.”

“It’s like I told Dong, Albert. Business is booming.”

I took a big chewy satisfied bite of Korean horse penis and let the juices drip down my chin.

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