Drug Kingpin Nate Newton’s Pro Football Prognostications – Week 13
Burgeoning drug kingpin Nate Newton builds his drug empire and gives you his football picks each week.
One of ‘Lil Billy Bates’ best dealers, Mikey-I, gets ripped off by some weedheads.
Bates: You got the details on those stoners that jumped you, Mikey?
Irvin: Yeah, I found ’em.
Bates: (reading Mikey-I’s scrawled chickenscratch) This a ‘5’ or an ‘S’?
Irvin: That’s a 5, yo. No wait….S. No, no….yeah, it’s a 5.
Bates: Jesus, how do you misspell ‘street’?
Irvin: Hey man, I’m slangin’ mad volume and stackin’ fat benjis, knowmsayin’? I can’t be bothered with spellin’ every little thing right.
Bates: Whatever, you got names?
Irvin: Her name was….I dunno, just some lady. But people on the streets call him Bernie.
Bates: Bernie? Not Brock? Not Butch? Lemme get this straight, you got jacked by a man named Bernie?
Lions (-6) over Packers
Cowboys (-10) over Raiders
Ravens (-3) over Steelers
Browns (-7) over Jaguars
Colts (-4) over Titans
Bears (+1) over Vikings
Jets (-2) over Dolphins
Cardinals (+3) over Eagles
Panthers (-8) over Buccaneers
Patriots (-9) over Texans
Bills (-3) over Falcons
49ers (-8) over Rams
Chiefs (+6) over Broncos
Chargers (-2) over Bengals
Giants (-2) over Washington
Saints (+5) over Seahawks
Last Week: 7-7
Best Week: 12-3-1 (Week 4)
Season: 75-76-11 (.497)