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Washington & Madison: Time Travelers – Episode 1.03

Posted in erbooker by erbooker on 08/09/2012

Clone George Washington and clone James Madison are traveling through time and space in order to thwart the Illuminati from achieving its goal of the New World Order…

Episode 103 – The Unsinkable Possible

April 1912, Atlantic Ocean

(George Washington and James Madison are walking the deck of the Titanic in the dark of night when George activates the time transponder and Dr. Thomas Edison VII’s face pops up on screen…)

Washington:  Where are we now, Doctor?

Edison:  You’re on board the RMS Titanic, a doomed passenger liner that hits an iceberg, crashes and sinks in the Atlantic in the spring of 1912.

Washington:  Oh, goodie.

Edison:  The reason the ship was sunk was to fake the death of wealthy steel magnate Reginald O. Vanderbilt — a known Illuminati operative — in order to give him the freedom to operate in absolute secrecy.

Washington:  The Illuminati sacrificed the lives of everyone on this massive ship just so one man could fake his death?

Edison:  Yes. They’re very evil. Your mission is to stop the ship from sinking and expose the young Mr. Vanderbilt’s plan.

Washington:  Very well. And how are our wives?

Edison:  They’re fine. Resting after the Moon Mole Man bites.

Washington:  Mole Man bites?

Edison:  Whoops, getting another transmission.

Washington:  What do you mean you’re getting another–oh, he’s hung up on me.

Madison:  (tugs on George’s pant leg)  Get a load of this.

(The two time travelers press against a wall and peer around the corner at a young couple near the railing overlooking the choppy Atlantic below…)

Wallace:  Aw, I love ya. Can’t ya see that, Alice? I wanna be your man, Al.

Astor:  For the last time, Hickory; I’m with Reginald now.

(Madison elbows Washington, who nods…)

Astor:  If you don’t stop bothering me on this voyage, I’m going to report you to Capt. Smith.

Wallace:  Fine, I don’t care. Report me, Al. I don’t care who knows. I wanna holler it from the top of this ship’s smokestacks. I love Alice Astor!

Astor:  (slaps Hickory)  Get a hold of yourself, Hick. I’m going back inside.

(Alice storms off and Hickory leans over the railing, shoulders slumped. He begins to climb up on the railing; but George swoops in and grabs him by the back of his coat…)

Wallace:  (turns around, glances at the former Presidents, turns back to railing)  Vaudeville show’s in the main ballroom. You fellas are late.

Washington:  Right. Sorry, but we couldn’t help but overhear your conversation, Mr….?

Wallace:  Sixth Officer Hickory Wallace. Friends call me Hick. Say, you’re not gonna tell Mr. Vanderbilt, are ya mister?

Washington:  (grins)  Mr. Vanderbilt. No. But we are looking for the gentleman in question. Do you know where he is, perchance?

Wallace:  (sulks)  Probably in the ballroom with his loving fiancee.  (leans back over railing, glances toward front of boat)  Say, we’re getting awfully close to that glacier up ahead.

(George looks where Officer Wallace is pointing to find a hulking block of ice glaring down ominously at the approaching ship…)

Washington:  That’s no glacier.  (eyes narrow)  That’s an iceberg.

Madison:  Pretty much the same thing though, right?


(The three men stare up at the towering iceberg and George grabs Sixth Officer Wallace by the lapels…)

Washington:  Quickly, son. You have to get us to this Captain Smith at once. That iceberg will sink us all!

Wallace:  (scoffs)  An iceberg? Sink us? The Titanic is unsinkable.

Madison:  You numbnuts. Didn’t you hear the General? We’re all goin’ down!

Wallace:  (rolls eyes)  Fine. But this is all overblown, if you ask me.

Madison:  Well it’s a good thing nobody asked you, then.

(The three race off toward the bridge at the front of the ship. Yards behind them, there’s a red flash and a stovepipe-hatted gentleman lands on the deck with a devilish grin…)

Lincoln:  And where are you scurrying off to, my pretties?


(Washington, Madison and Off. Wallace arrive at the bridge of the ship — Madison keeling over, catching his breath — only to find a drunken inebriate steering the liner wildly…)

Wallace:  Mr. Vanderbilt, what have you done with Capt. Smith?

Vanderbilt:  (hic)  Captain? I’m the Captain.

(A muffled noise is heard from the back of the bridge and Hickory opens a storage closet to find Capt. Smith and First Officer Morey bound and gagged…)

Smith:  (ungagged)  Stop that man! He’ll kill us all!

Washington:  Unhand those controls, Vanderbilt.

(Reginald O. Vanderbilt whips out a pistol and fires into the ceiling…)

Vanderbilt:  (points pistol at George)  What kinda clown are you?  (hic)

Washington:  I’m no clown. I’m Gen. George Washington, President of these United States.

Madison:  We’re on the ocean, George.

Washington:  He knows what I mean, James.

Vanderbilt:  ‘Fraid I don’t, ya kook. I reckon I’m gonna crash this here ship into that there iceberg over yonder.

Washington:  Why? To further your dastardly Illuminati deeds?

Vanderbilt:  (eyes bulge, fires another shot into the ceiling, flees the bridge)

Washington:  After him!

Madison:  (panting)  Oh God, not again.

Smith:  (takes hold of ship controls, steers hard to the left)  We might just miss it, men.

Lincoln:  (appears in doorway, rifle cocked)  I don’t think so, Capt. Smith. If that is your real name.

Smith:  (frowns)  It is.

Lincoln:  (scowls)  Just get back in the closet, sailor boy.


(The ship trembles, dropping George and James to the deck. They look up to see Reginald Vanderbilt ascending on a rope to a zeppelin floating above the ship as passengers cry out…)

Vanderbilt:  I reckon we’ll meet again real soon, Mr. President.

(Vanderbilt cackles as the zeppelin whisks him away and the Titanic quickly begins taking on water, breaking apart and sinking into the Atlantic Ocean. George and James are left floating on a bit of board away from the wreckage and the screams of the drowning passengers…)

Madison:  Well George, looks like we’re all washed up. Ha ha, shipwreck joke.

Washington:  I don’t think Dr. Edison is going to be very happy with us.

Madison:  Maybe he won’t find out?

Washington:  About the sinking of the Titanic. I think he’ll hear of it.

(George clicks the time transponder and a swirling blue vortex opens up on the ocean’s surface twenty yards away from the floating board…)

Washington:  Can you swim?

Madison:  Not well. Piggyback?

Washington:  (sighs)

(Abraham Lincoln is paddling a chandelier and watches the vortex shut in the distance…)

Lincoln:  (grins)  The hunt continues.

(Nearby, Alice Astor is trying in vain to pull Off. Hickory Wallace onto the wooden plank she’s floating on…)

Astor:  I’ll always love you, Hick!

Wallace:  I’ll always love you, Al!  (drowns)

Lincoln:  (exaggerated eye roll, gagging motion)

Astor:  (glares)

Lincoln:  (disappears into vortex)

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